In the absence of business trips and international football matches, early man’s only excuse for spending a whole day away from the cave without having to come back with anything.

What he had to tell early woman.

Implement named after the first great angler. Unfortunately useless until twine was invented.

Amount of fish caught.

Things you catch that aren’t fish.

Social grouping of anglers.

Coarse Fishing
Rude language when you don’t catch anything.

Fly fishing
Unwittingly ensnaring a tiddler whilst swimming in unfastened trousers.

Hook, Line and Sinker
Had hit records with “Twist and Trout”, “You Keep Me Salmon On”, and “Return of the Mackerel”.

Sang the low notes.

What anglers do when they don’t catch anything.

Stupid buoy.

Fishermen with a bottle-opener.

Paddling out to retrieve your rod after a mistake during casting.

Hook baiting
Technique developed by Peter Pan.

Fly fishing
Also developed by Peter Pan. Often catches crocodiles.

Dance performed by anglers who catch something. Not seen very often.

Throwing back
What happens if you actually eat what you’ve caught out of most of Britain’s rivers.

Getting a bite
Reason for not sitting on the grass.

Sensible alternative to the grass.

Someone who does sit on the grass.

Angling Times
Attempting to interest fish in your hook by showing them the day’s headlines.

Compleat Angler
Term of abuse.

Fishermen say a hook through the lip is not painful. Or, at least, fishermen who have never had a hook through their lip say that.

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Not FOR beginners, but BY beginners…