Newton

Origins
He was the apple of his mother’s eye.

First law of motion
Inertia. It was ages before he could be bothered to write it down.

Second law of motion
Acceleration. Once he’d written the first one he really got going.

Third law of motion
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. In Newton’s case. It was a loud “Ouch!” when the apple hit him on the head.

Speed of sound
He calculated the amount of time between the apple falling onto his head and him saying, “Ouch!”

Standing on the shoulders of giants
Before it fell, this was the only way he could reach the apple.

Law of gravitation
When he became president of the Royal Society lots of people wanted to be his friend.

Alchemy
Even more people gravitated to him when he told them he could turn lead into gold.

Prism
His experiments in alchemy could have sent him here.

Angular momentum
Newton was quite tall and had a funny walk.

Theory of colour
But he decided if he wore black, he’d look distinguished and no one would notice.

Reflecting telescope
He invented this so he could check how he looked from a long way away.

Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica
His most famous book. Pretentious, sui?

Ether
The experiments worked or they didn’t.

Hermetic ideas
Newton was a bit of a loner.

Electrostatic generator
Especially after invented the nylon carpet and metal doorknob.

Calculus
Newton claimed he invented this, but in fact it was Herge, in the Tin Tin books.

Conclusion
Without Newton, scrumping would have stayed in the Dark Ages.

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