Origins
India is a subcontinent. As soon as it surfaced it became all the Raj.

Calcutta
Full of naked dancers.

Goa
Naked dancer.

Lucknow
What you say when you get to Calcutta.

Jaipur
Indian comedian.

Uttar Pradesh
Heckle.

Punjab
Little prick. Humorous riposte by jaipur.

Jodhpur
Where women wear the trousers.

Patna
What Indian animals like before they go in the curry.

Bombay
Duck!

Pondicherry
Berries that grow under water. Essential for a subcontinent.

Trivandrum
Indian cocktail often featuring a pondicherry on a stick.

Nagpur
Constantly having a go at the cat for playing with your pondicherries.

Jammu
Made from pondicherries.

Delhi
Store selling jammu.

New Delhi
Competitor.

Ganges
Robbers who target delhis.

Mumbai
Mother is in the delhi.

Agra
Violent place. Full of ganges.

Assam
Short for Assamuel.

Darjeeling
Assam’s sweetheart. When she sees him her heart goes: “Boom biddy boom biddy boom…” etc.

Haryana
Always carried a candle for Assam, but her lack of depilation repelled him.

Srinigar
Indian racehorse kidnapped by ganges.

Ghats
Annoying flies.

Maharashtra
Type of maharaja who smokes heavily.

Manipur
Happy man. Life for him is a bowl of pondicherries.

Sikkim
Unwell man. Could have eaten over-ripe pondicherries.

Gujurat
Rodent partial to pondicherries.

Thar desert
Pirates finding a part of India inhospitable.

Tripura
Cat learning to express itself.

West Bengal
Huge tiger (or pura) so big it’s only half in India.

Meghalaya
Huge tiger looking for a mate.

Bay of Bengal
Dangerous place to go paddling. Especially if you’re a tigress.

Conclusion
India is now firmly attached to Asia and so is unlikely to submerge again unless there is a very heavy pondicherry crop.